Swollen "Pure Luck" Style

It's been a long time since I've been heard splashing around on here. That's due in large part to having been blessed with a sudden and steady stream of actual money-making assignments. But unfortunately it's also due to the fact that this whole pregnancy thing is not quite as much fun as it once was. I don't like complaining too much, but it's been tough. I've had backaches every evening, I can't fit rings on my fingers any more, I can't fit even basic sandals onto my feet, my whole skeleton needs popped back into place anytime I stand up from sitting or laying, and painful contractions wrap around my body and wake me at odd times of the night.


The other night, I said to Craig, "And this is a healthy, normal pregnancy."


He said, "Just imagine how much worse it can be. Imagine women who have complications and how it must feel to them."


"No," I said. "I don't care about them. Don't belittle my misery."


"I'm sorry," he said.


"That's right, you're sorry," I said, fluffing my pillows and arranging the whole back/belly/knee support system we worked out months ago.


We had our 36 week appointment yesterday morning. I'd really been looking forward to this appointment as the "beginning of the end," so to speak. And it was a good and exciting appointment. But. In the two weeks since I last saw my doctor, I've gained 6 lbs of "water weight." (So yeah, all those green and fruit salads, those non-fat yogurt smoothies, passing up on that maple cream-filled long john doughnut at Bible Study Tuesday morning--it was all totally worth it. I so went straight from my doctor's office to McDonald's!)


Now I know if I were you reading this, I'd be thinking, "Yeah. Right. That's all water weight." In fact, I'm kind of thinking that anyway. But I do know that I have so much water swelling me up that it is actually painful to type this or to do much of anything with my fingers. My feet are so swollen, only my flip-flops fit any more and every time I look at them, I'm reminded of that scene in Pure Luck where Martin Short is stung by that bee. Worse, my doctor told me I need to start sleeping in a semi-sitting position to keep my face from swelling in a similar manner. Then she proceeded to tell us (and she made a point of looking at my husband as she did so) that after labor all the additional blood flowing through my body that once went to the placenta will have nowhere to go and so will swell me up even more for as long as a week, potentially making me "appear almost deformed."

Well, so last night I did. I changed my sleeping position. Craig built up a pile of 5 pillows for me, taking care to create a nice sloping surface so I wouldn't wake up with a kink in my neck. At first I "sat" there for an hour or so wondering how this was going to work. Then I decided I could "recline" on my mountain of pillows on my side and be much more comfortable. And it was much more comfortable! I may just always sleep that way from here on out. Or not. We'll see what new "side effects" come up between now and next week that may require yet another sleep position.